You know, for some reason, I am always so reflective leading up to Christmas. Christmas would have to be my number ONE holiday - a time of year of such joy and giving--but leading up to it for me is almost painful. You don't understand that do you? I don't blame you--I almost don't either.
Maybe if I explain by saying that I don't just have emotions---I FEEL emotions when I acknowledge them. Physically and emotionally. Especially at this time of year. I always have- even as a child. While my friends were making Santa lists and happily dreaming of 'Sugar Plum Fairies', I was concentrating on - OK- what I wanted for Christmas, but also worried about how children in the world would feel if they didn't get any Christmas surprises. I mean, Santa was special, but even he could make mistakes! Even as a kid I thought too much!
My way of coping with this 'syndrome' was to lay under our Christmas tree, which in Iowa was a real pine tree, and look up at the lights on the tree, and contemplate--Alright--I wasn't a normal kid--but, today who is!! As the years passed, and I survived and enjoyed each Christmas holiday, and eventually had children of my own...a funny thing happened. My second daughter, Lauren became a contemplator--and it was not unusual to find her laying under our Australian artificial pine tree, looking up at lights, and thinking about 'things'.
I used to ask her what she was thinking about, and she would just tell me: "...I feel safe here, Mum. Just want to feel it's quiet." I knew what she meant, so I would leave her alone.
So, as we begin this wonderful holiday season, I wish you all much happiness....and then maybe a spare moment to contemplate--on your life, your happiness, and what yet you could do...maybe a random act somewhere...for someone. Not everyone has a Christmas tree.
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